The traumatized vet, the abandoned child, the depressed teenager caught in the isolation of the pandemic, the person of color bearing the daily devastating sting of racism, the white woman seeking to heal her complicity in systems that harm others, the policeman who feels himself trapped in the brutality baked into his work – each is seeking a sanctuary, a refuge, a haven in which he and she can feel safe enough to get in touch with the roots of these traumas so they can be bathed in healing care. Relational neuroscience is teaching us that we are the sanctuary, the refuge, the safe haven for each other.
During this keynote, we will explore with Bonnie what true safety means and what we can do to cultivate such a space. It begins with attending to our own inner world by having those we can depend on listen deeply to us, without judgment or a need to change us in any way. It continues with exploring and embodying some of the core principles of interpersonal neurobiology for support in remaining steady as the waves of another’s emotions come to us. Over time, as our window of tolerance expands and grows steady, we can be an increasingly healing presence with our clients and in our daily walk in the world.